Experimental - Kiss

Phenomenological

Slightly experimental shot of some friends - They asked for it, I didn't sneak up on them with a camera. :oogle Any and all comments good or bad are welcome here I just want some opinions!

Nikolai

Phenomenological wrote:

Slightly experimental shot of some friends - They asked for it, I didn't sneak up on them with a camera. :oogle Any and all comments good or bad are welcome here I just want some opinions!

Nice closeup!

I like the zig-zag of the lines in the middle!

Background, while blurred, is still distracting, especially one the top where blends with color of the faces and breaks the clarity of the lines. Always watch for background, this is one of the few things that typically differentiates a snapshot from a pro work.

Few speckles of mascara - easily removed in ACR/PS/whatever.

Light is a bit too bland to my personal taste (but I am biased here:-). I wonder what a good BW conversion can give.

The dead-center composition, while appropriate, makes this shot quite static. I am not getting any feeling that should accompany any good kiss. Suggestions: tilt; shift off-center; moderate radial blur (zoom) with the focus on a lips...

All in all, good experiment!

HTH

Phenomenological

Odd, when I re-opened this thread before reading your comment I suddenly thought of black and white! Thanks for the constructive criticism, it's really appreciated. Unfortunately didn't have much control over the lighting or indeed a lot else it was more of a candid thing, however hopefully I'll get a chance to do more portrait type work in the future, it's still something I'm quite new to.

Black and White version with slight contrast boost.

Nikolai

Phenomenological wrote:

Odd, when I re-opened this thread before reading your comment I suddenly thought of black and white! Thanks for the constructive criticism, it's really appreciated. Unfortunately didn't have much control over the lighting or indeed a lot else it was more of a candid thing, however hopefully I'll get a chance to do more portrait type work in the future, it's still something I'm quite new to.

Black and White version with slight contrast boost.

I like this one better!
Wanna try strong vignette? It should eliminate the "top distraction" a bit and bring more focus to the lips, thus justifying the centric composition.

bandgeekndb

Now I know Nikolai is being picky with pro advice here, but I'll chime in from a general bystander perspective: Great shot! While everything Nikolai said is true, I found myself not noticing them until I read his comments.

So, best of luck in the future, I hope to keep seeing more work like this! I wish I knew a good enough photographer near me to take pics with my girlfriend like this! Somehow, she's always my model and I'm trapped behind the camera, although sometimes I fear my ugly mug would break my precious Nikon!

~Nick

sweet caroline

The mascara bugged me, but it looks like you took care of it. The black and white is much stronger, and the lighting doesn't look as flat. I like it.

Caroline

marikris

I do like it better in the new b&w version as well I do wish the lips were more the focal point rather than her lashes, but, would you mind if I experimented with it a little?

gvf

Well, looks like a real kiss to me!

Phenomenological

Thanks all

I do wish the lips were more the focal point rather than her lashes, but, would you mind if I experimented with it a little?

As do I but the framing and focussing was rather rushed, and sure feel free to.

Phenomenological

Ok slightly tweaked the editing - Improvement?

Nikolai

Phenomenological wrote:

Ok slightly tweaked the editing - Improvement?

Yes, imho.
Also an idea to try: add Exposure layer (CS4), set Gamma to about +0.40..+0.60 and use linear gradient on mask to darken the Top Left corner a bit. As always, use Opacity to finess...

Chrissiebeez_NL

Phenomenological wrote:

Ok slightly tweaked the editing - Improvement?

very nice monsieur!

too bad you removed the mascara from her, the sloppy mascara and the 10 hairs comming out of his chin (how cute!) really add to the 'young couple' feel haha. but i understand why you did it off course.

bhogle

Big improvement!

You got some good criticisms here and took them in stride.

I especially like the vignette.

Phenomenological

Thank you all for your comments and feedback