"Smile for the Camera" Reality.
dragon300zx
Registered Users Posts: 2,575 Major grins
This is being debated over on FM in the wedding section. A photographer was told that because the bride wasn't smiling she must not have liked him. This was my response as I read this article on slate magazine the other day in the dear prudence section. Just thought it would be helpful if we all remember not everyone looks like 
all the time.
Dear Prudence,
How do you respond to someone (a total stranger) who, out of nowhere, tells you to smile—or remarks on the lack of a smile on your face? In the past month I've observed the following incidents. At the checkout line in my grocery store, there was a woman in front of me and a man in front of her. The man looked at the woman, who was not smiling, and said to her, "You must be having a bad day." She mumbled something in reply and gave an apologetic smile. After they left, I heard the two checkout clerks in the area speaking angrily to one another about what had just happened. One of them said indignantly, "What if her mother had just died?!" The other said, "I would have told him, 'My day was fine until you came along!' " And so on. In another instance, a young man next to me at a sandwich shop, while placing his order, said to the young girl behind the counter, "Smile!" She quickly looked down at her work, cringed, and said, "Oh, it's just been a long day, I guess." (That's the kind of response I probably would have made.) Then a few days ago, a male co-worker came into the office, annoyed, and said, "I hate it when people think I'm in a bad mood just because I'm not smiling. I'm not in a bad mood at all." Apparently someone (another total stranger) had said something to him while he was in the parking lot. When it's happened to me, I know I've felt offended. I don't want to be rude, but they're out of line, aren't they? I just would like to know how a person is supposed to respond to these people.
—Smiling When I Feel Like It
Dear Smile,
These commentators are strangers? What's up with that? Prudie thinks a proper response would be nonverbal communication. Something along the lines of knitting your eyebrows together, narrowing your eyes, and making the slightest sneer, all while cocking your head to a 45 degree angle.
—Prudie, huffily
I myself am a non-smiler. Because it takes alot to make me smile. It doesn't come naturally to me and it doesn't happen alot. When I was in high school the teams and groups I was in always refused to smile for pictures. Lack of a smile doesn't reflect on the photographer. Maybe the person was stressed, tired, in deep thought, busy, doesn't like to smile, or just didn't care to smile. Lets face it most brides have so much going on the smiling thing gets forgotten, or they don't feel like it. If we keep saying, "smile" they are gonna get ticked as our job is to capture the day, not direct it. I'd let your friend know that you are glad she is a smiley person (the photographers friends made the comment about the smile). However not everyone is and just cause someone isn't smiling doesn't mean they don't like you. Maybe the bride just had botox injections and couldn't smile.
all the time.Dear Prudence,
How do you respond to someone (a total stranger) who, out of nowhere, tells you to smile—or remarks on the lack of a smile on your face? In the past month I've observed the following incidents. At the checkout line in my grocery store, there was a woman in front of me and a man in front of her. The man looked at the woman, who was not smiling, and said to her, "You must be having a bad day." She mumbled something in reply and gave an apologetic smile. After they left, I heard the two checkout clerks in the area speaking angrily to one another about what had just happened. One of them said indignantly, "What if her mother had just died?!" The other said, "I would have told him, 'My day was fine until you came along!' " And so on. In another instance, a young man next to me at a sandwich shop, while placing his order, said to the young girl behind the counter, "Smile!" She quickly looked down at her work, cringed, and said, "Oh, it's just been a long day, I guess." (That's the kind of response I probably would have made.) Then a few days ago, a male co-worker came into the office, annoyed, and said, "I hate it when people think I'm in a bad mood just because I'm not smiling. I'm not in a bad mood at all." Apparently someone (another total stranger) had said something to him while he was in the parking lot. When it's happened to me, I know I've felt offended. I don't want to be rude, but they're out of line, aren't they? I just would like to know how a person is supposed to respond to these people.
—Smiling When I Feel Like It
Dear Smile,
These commentators are strangers? What's up with that? Prudie thinks a proper response would be nonverbal communication. Something along the lines of knitting your eyebrows together, narrowing your eyes, and making the slightest sneer, all while cocking your head to a 45 degree angle.
—Prudie, huffily
I myself am a non-smiler. Because it takes alot to make me smile. It doesn't come naturally to me and it doesn't happen alot. When I was in high school the teams and groups I was in always refused to smile for pictures. Lack of a smile doesn't reflect on the photographer. Maybe the person was stressed, tired, in deep thought, busy, doesn't like to smile, or just didn't care to smile. Lets face it most brides have so much going on the smiling thing gets forgotten, or they don't feel like it. If we keep saying, "smile" they are gonna get ticked as our job is to capture the day, not direct it. I'd let your friend know that you are glad she is a smiley person (the photographers friends made the comment about the smile). However not everyone is and just cause someone isn't smiling doesn't mean they don't like you. Maybe the bride just had botox injections and couldn't smile.
Everyone Has A Photographic Memory. Some Just Do Not Have Film.
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