A Horrible "Experience":

elfving73elfving73 Registered Users Posts: 941 Major grins
edited September 13, 2005 in People
"Liam was ill. Very ill. The doctors had given him 1-2 weeks. There had been 11 days. He was lying in his bed. I sat next to him, stroking his pale cheek. We looked into eachothers eyes, we both knew. I held back my tears. I wispered "Don't be afraid". I leaned over, kissed his forhead. He gave off a sigh and I felt his very last last breath in my face, and he slipped away. Then the tears fell. I layed down by his side, huged him and wispered: "Farewell, son". I lay there, for a long time huging him. Then suddenly, he opened his eyes, looked at me, smiled, and said "Daddy!"

That was a combination of a dream and a little peace of reality. The weird thing is that for the first time ever, Liam had left his bed and crept down beside me. I hadn't noticed. I didn't realized that I was awake, and I didn't realize I had been dreaming. Everything float toghether. I just found myself lying there, hugging Liam, believing he was dead. For a moment, I really did believe that. When I finlay put things togheter, I couldn't held back my tears. It was a turbulent morning.

How I love my son! (both sons of course)

Regards / Matty

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Comments

  • AndyAndy Registered Users Posts: 50,016 Major grins
    edited September 11, 2005
    sometimes, dreams suck. but even dreams like you had, make us sit back and remember how fortunate we are, to have and hold what we've got and are blessed with.

    matty, you're a great dad - it's really cool to watch your kids grow up through your photography!

    thanks for sharing this experience with us.
    Andy

    Portfolio • Workshops • Facebook • Twitter
  • elfving73elfving73 Registered Users Posts: 941 Major grins
    edited September 11, 2005
    Yepp! You're so right, sometimes dreams sucks! This dream was extremly "realistic". No haze, strange colors, time warps and stuff like that. I have NEVER woke up believing someting I've been dreaming about before. *Weird* It really affected me! *Piuh!*

    Matty

    andy wrote:
    sometimes, dreams suck. but even dreams like you had, make us sit back and remember how fortunate we are, to have and hold what we've got and are blessed with.

    matty, you're a great dad - it's really cool to watch your kids grow up through your photography!

    thanks for sharing this experience with us.
  • mereimagemereimage Registered Users Posts: 448 Major grins
    edited September 11, 2005
    I'd have been scared shitless
    They become part of you...Family is life.....................Matter of fact my heart dropped into my stomach as I was reading your post............. don't scare us like that,.... glad it was a dream................................................Mereimage
  • rahmonsterrahmonster Registered Users Posts: 1,376 Major grins
    edited September 11, 2005
    15524779-Ti.gif
    Glad it was just a dream. I know what you mean. I have had dreams like that and you wake and run to their bed just to make sure you were dreaming.

    The thing that amazed the most about being a parent was the fact that I didn't know it was possible to love someone that much. Your sons are beautiful little boys and I can see how much you love them in every picture you take.
    www.tmitchell.smugmug.com

    Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life...Picasso
  • AngeloAngelo Super Moderators Posts: 8,937 moderator
    edited September 11, 2005
    damn man, you freaked me out. i teared up before I got to the second half of your story. don't EVER do that again umph.gif


    Thank God it was only a dream. I owe you a punch in the nose. rolleyes1.gif
    now, go hug your boys some more.
    www.angelo.smugmug.com

    Moderator of: Location, Location, Location , Mind Your Own Business & Other Cool Shots
  • lulalakelulalake Registered Users Posts: 93 Big grins
    edited September 11, 2005
    Oh Matty and Liam
    I am so glad you are posting here, I've missed Liam pics. Now dude don't scare me like this!

    Please, as Liam's wanna be writer, please post another of your wonderful series shots of Liam so I can write more Liam Dialogue.

    Thanks

    Jules
  • gluwatergluwater Registered Users Posts: 3,599 Major grins
    edited September 11, 2005
    You were just trying to make us cry weren't youbncry.gif
    I'm glad it was only a dream. You show us how much you love your sons through your pictures of them. And from what I can tell they are two of the most loved boys around. I like the picture you posted, it really looks like you had just stopped crying and were still holding your son. Great job captureing a gut wrenching experience.
    Nick
    SmugMug Technical Account Manager
    Travel = good. Woo, shooting!
    nickwphoto
  • elfving73elfving73 Registered Users Posts: 941 Major grins
    edited September 12, 2005
    It was very scary, I'll tell ya! Sorry, looking back at my post, I should have told from the beginning this was a dream.

    Matty
    mereimage wrote:
    I'd have been scared shitless
    They become part of you...Family is life.....................Matter of fact my heart dropped into my stomach as I was reading your post............. don't scare us like that,.... glad it was a dream................................................Mereimage
  • elfving73elfving73 Registered Users Posts: 941 Major grins
    edited September 12, 2005
    You're right! Before bein' a father, there was no way I could realize how incredible much parents loves their children. Of course I knew that they love'em.... but, well, you know what I mean!

    Matty
    rahmonster wrote:
    15524779-Ti.gif
    Glad it was just a dream. I know what you mean. I have had dreams like that and you wake and run to their bed just to make sure you were dreaming.

    The thing that amazed the most about being a parent was the fact that I didn't know it was possible to love someone that much. Your sons are beautiful little boys and I can see how much you love them in every picture you take.
  • elfving73elfving73 Registered Users Posts: 941 Major grins
    edited September 12, 2005
    Sorry! Initially, I should have written it was just a bad dream. You're right, I deserve a punch on the nose! rolleyes1.gif

    Matty
    Angelo wrote:
    damn man, you freaked me out. i teared up before I got to the second half of your story. don't EVER do that again umph.gif


    Thank God it was only a dream. I owe you a punch in the nose. rolleyes1.gif
    now, go hug your boys some more.
  • elfving73elfving73 Registered Users Posts: 941 Major grins
    edited September 12, 2005
    Haha! Thanx Jules! Sorry that I scared ya, I should have written "A Horrible Dream" instead, I realize that now.

    I'll keep on posting Liam-pics! thumb.gif

    Matty
    lulalake wrote:
    I am so glad you are posting here, I've missed Liam pics. Now dude don't scare me like this!

    Please, as Liam's wanna be writer, please post another of your wonderful series shots of Liam so I can write more Liam Dialogue.

    Thanks

    Jules
  • elfving73elfving73 Registered Users Posts: 941 Major grins
    edited September 12, 2005
    Haha! Yes Nick! That was my intention! mwink.gif Naa... but serioulsy - it was such an traumatic and weird experience, and I just felt that I wanted to share it, for some reason. I don't think it's silly for a guy to cry, but I can't remember when I cried the last time. Afterwards, I almost wished that there was somenone lurkin' around takin' candids of me (us) for a change. *Haha* I think it could have been rather emotionall images.

    Matty
    gluwater wrote:
    You were just trying to make us cry weren't youbncry.gif
    I'm glad it was only a dream. You show us how much you love your sons through your pictures of them. And from what I can tell they are two of the most loved boys around. I like the picture you posted, it really looks like you had just stopped crying and were still holding your son. Great job captureing a gut wrenching experience.
  • John MuellerJohn Mueller Registered Users Posts: 2,555 Major grins
    edited September 12, 2005
    When I first read this my heart dropped:nono
    I wouldnt call it a dream but more of a nightmare.
    Give em big hugs from me Matty.:feelgood
    My Smuggy

    Cincinnati Smug Leader
  • Steve CaviglianoSteve Cavigliano Super Moderators Posts: 3,599 moderator
    edited September 12, 2005
    What a nightmare
    Matty,
    I was on the edge of my seat reading your post. I had a lump in my throat and it was getting hard to see your words clearly :cry I was so relieved to read that it was only a dream. clap.gif

    OMG, a parent's worst fear :uhoh I hate those type of nightmares. Well those and the ones of me flying around neekid....Laughing.gif

    How strange that Liam was in bed with you. Maybe your dreams crossed paths and he needed some comforting too ne_nau.gif

    As Andy mentioned, your dream is just another reason to appreciate and hold on tightly to your children. Another reason to tell them everyday how much you love them and how happy they make you iloveyou.gif

    Whew! Glad it was just a dream,

    Steve
    SmugMug Support Hero
  • aurafloraauraflora Registered Users Posts: 471 Major grins
    edited September 13, 2005
    Hi Matty...


    Your dream sent shivers down my spine. Please only dream wonderful things.

    Michal
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