Respond to a "missing photos" message?

ssimmonsphotossimmonsphoto Registered Users Posts: 424 Major grins
edited January 13, 2011 in Weddings
I didn't sleep at all last night because I'm stressing about reply to this bride. So I'd love to have your input to help me not screw myself over in my reply. Here are the details:
  • Bride has emailed me claiming to be missing approximately 6 photos that her husband "knows I took" (primarily portrait type photos with various members of his family)
  • I went through all of my RAW photos to see if I had rejected them by accident and I didn't
  • I then went through and looked at the file names and EXIF shoot times to see if there was a gap anywhere (missing card check). There isn't. The numbers of continuous and the times are pretty close together
  • I have a clause in my contract stating that there is no guarantee that I won't miss any moment
How the heck would you respond? I'm majorly stressing out about it. I want to make her happy, but I can't only find photos that "might count" for four out of the six (meaning one with his grandma, but his parents are sister are in it too). Any help at all would be appreciated.
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Comments

  • studio1972studio1972 Registered Users Posts: 249 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    I didn't sleep at all last night because I'm stressing about reply to this bride. So I'd love to have your input to help me not screw myself over in my reply. Here are the details:
    • Bride has emailed me claiming to be missing approximately 6 photos that her husband "knows I took" (primarily portrait type photos with various members of his family)
    • I went through all of my RAW photos to see if I had rejected them by accident and I didn't
    • I then went through and looked at the file names and EXIF shoot times to see if there was a gap anywhere (missing card check). There isn't. The numbers of continuous and the times are pretty close together
    • I have a clause in my contract stating that there is no guarantee that I won't miss any moment
    How the heck would you respond? I'm majorly stressing out about it. I want to make her happy, but I can't only find photos that "might count" for four out of the six (meaning one with his grandma, but his parents are sister are in it too). Any help at all would be appreciated.

    Were these shots that they had requested formally before the wedding? If not then you've got nothing to worry about, so just be honest with them and explain that you didn't take those shots.
  • ssimmonsphotossimmonsphoto Registered Users Posts: 424 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    studio1972 wrote: »
    Were these shots that they had requested formally before the wedding? If not then you've got nothing to worry about, so just be honest with them and explain that you didn't take those shots.
    No shot list or anything of that nature. He seems sure that I took them, but it looks like I didn't. I'm just fried about it at this point since I hate having disappointed customers. I know it's a fact of business sometimes, but it still stinks and I know I'm taking it personally.
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  • heatherfeatherheatherfeather Registered Users Posts: 2,738 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    So the question is... are they upset about it? If so.... wait a couple days. Let things simmer down. Look for the photos. Then, I would show him some photos of people taking photos and the actual results and explain that a lot of time people have NO idea what I took, and are quite surprised when they see the result. You probably took a photo when he thought you did, but of something different. He can't know which focal length... etc... that you are using.
  • SystemSystem Registered Users Posts: 8,186 moderator
    edited January 5, 2011
    I know this is no help to you but crap like this is one of the reasons I've never went into wedding photography.
  • ssimmonsphotossimmonsphoto Registered Users Posts: 424 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    So the question is... are they upset about it? If so.... wait a couple days. Let things simmer down. Look for the photos. Then, I would show him some photos of people taking photos and the actual results and explain that a lot of time people have NO idea what I took, and are quite surprised when they see the result. You probably took a photo when he thought you did, but of something different. He can't know which focal length... etc... that you are using.

    I'm upset, but mostly because it is one part of multiple things that just aren't going right this week. It's the kind of week that is just leaving me feeling cruddy and second guessing everything. I'm planning to send her a response tonight so she doesn't think I'm ignoring the problem.
    captain78 wrote: »
    I know this is no help to you but crap like this is one of the reasons I've never went into wedding photography.

    I love my job. Love having my business. But this sort of stuff gets to me and makes me second guess doing it. I get overly critical of my own work, which doesn't help my frame of mind at all.
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  • VayCayMomVayCayMom Registered Users Posts: 1,870 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    I only have two weddings under my belt, and had a complaint from my first bride that there weren't enough photos of her and hubby together at reception. At first i was annoyed, my feathers were rumpled. Then I thought well why aren't there more? What is the reason i don't seem to have many in her mind? I worked hard to do a good job, i would never drop the ball like that.
    I went through all the images and made a gallery for her of each and every shot taken at the reception with her in it, with or without hubby. I made a timeline and laid it all out. The gaps between shots of them were mostly about 10-12 minutes. guess what? after she saw everything laid out her response was " I guess we weren't together as much as I thought" True!
    Be honest with your bride/groom. Tell them you want to make them happy and have looked for these images that the groom thinks exist, explain how you went through your files, no gaps were found etc etc. Offer a theory or two. You have nothing to hide, you did a good job, there just is a memory the groom has of some photos that you do not recall shooting nor can you find them.
    Trudy
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  • l.k.madisonl.k.madison Registered Users Posts: 542 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    No offense to the groom, but it was his wedding day - if he remembers every detail as to what you took pictures of and what you didn't, he had other things to worry about. My wedding was 3 1/2 years ago and I'd forgotten details about it until recently when somebody brought it up. It happens, be honest with her, show her the timeline of shots if you have to.

    I only do weddings as EXTREME favors - for that one very reason.

    Be honest with her. Remember that some people find flaws in everything and regardless of what you do, you can't make them happy.
  • ian408ian408 Administrators Posts: 21,938 moderator
    edited January 5, 2011
    Heather's explanation is nearest the truth. Just because the camera is pointed in one direction doesn't mean you have a given picture.

    Best of luck to you.
    Moderator Journeys/Sports/Big Picture :: Need some help with dgrin?
  • BradfordBennBradfordBenn Registered Users Posts: 2,506 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    Also with the proliferation of P&S cameras and DSLRs is it possible that a guest took the picture and he is just thinking "camera pointed at me must be photographer"? This happened at a friend of mine's wedding. Our solution all of us that were there gave him all our "casual" photos and the ones that were missing were magically found.
    -=Bradford

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  • ssimmonsphotossimmonsphoto Registered Users Posts: 424 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    Also with the proliferation of P&S cameras and DSLRs is it possible that a guest took the picture and he is just thinking "camera pointed at me must be photographer"? This happened at a friend of mine's wedding. Our solution all of us that were there gave him all our "casual" photos and the ones that were missing were magically found.

    That's what I'm thinking has happened. There were, needless to say, a ton of people there and a couple with dSLRs. So my guess is that someone else has it and they just thought it was me.

    Thanks for all of your comments, everyone. I'm calming down and will be sending her a reply tonight. It has been the perfect storm of end of the season things not going right/as planned.
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  • QarikQarik Registered Users Posts: 4,959 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    just be honest tell them what you told us regards to your investigation. The tone should be matter of fact with slight sympathy and start with "I am sorry but..."

    Don't be too apologetic or too defensive. Offer up an explanation like heahter mentioned to give the husband some face.
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  • TravelTravel Registered Users Posts: 276 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    Be careful these people may be looking for something for free. They may now feel the money pinch want more of your photos but don't want to spend the money. They will try to use this as a tool to get a deal, a too good deal. Make sure the deal in in your favor like : buy 100-8x10s at regular price and get a free 11x14 then sell them the frame for the 11x14.
  • Ed911Ed911 Registered Users Posts: 1,306 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    Here's my advice. Just suspect that they are curious, until you hear different. Don't read anything into her email. Explain that you checked your originals and that there were no missing images in her set.

    Never second guess yourself...let the evidence develope...otherwise you'll wind up taking' pills.

    Always remember that you are the reference...she is simply asking if her husband could be right...and she may not have even wanted to.


    Hope this helps.
    Remember, no one may want you to take pictures, but they all want to see them.
    Educate yourself like you'll live forever and live like you'll die tomorrow.

    Ed
  • ssimmonsphotossimmonsphoto Registered Users Posts: 424 Major grins
    edited January 5, 2011
    Thank you again for all of your advice and reassurance. I have sent the bride an email to try to smooth her feathers. She is a real sweetheart, so I'm hoping to maintain a positive relationship with her when everything is said and done.
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  • ssimmonsphotossimmonsphoto Registered Users Posts: 424 Major grins
    edited January 13, 2011
    Just in case anyone is interested in what happened, I sent my carefully crafted message and have not heard from the bride since. I'm a bit bummed that I haven't heard from her to at least say that she understands or confirm that she received it or anything. But I am looking at the bright side and at least marking the issue as resolved in my mind.

    Thanks again for all of your help and suggestions. thumb.gif
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  • catspawcatspaw Registered Users Posts: 1,292 Major grins
    edited January 13, 2011
    You responded professionally and in a timely manner. It's all good :) Excellent discussion here though!
    //Leah
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