Mixed Blessings

Syncopation

I've just spent Easter weekend with my parents in the North of England. It's always a mixed blessing. They still live in the house I was born in so emotions always run deep for me every time I visit.

The countryside is beautiful






The flipside is that my father has dementia. He has always been a great one for DIY but has now lost all his practical skills and spends much of his time organising tools and other hardware that he will never use. Here is his workbench, once the the scene of craftmanship, now the home of an altogether different kind of compulsion

Nmahooch

The place is beautiful and so are the pics. Sorry to hear about your father.

swifteye

[/URL][/QUOTE]The flipside is that my father has dementia. He has always been a great one for DIY but has now lost all his practical skills and spends much of his time organising tools and other hardware that he will never use. Here is his workbench, once the the scene of craftmanship, now the home of an altogether different kind of compulsion[/URL][/QUOTE]

Have you thought of photographing "a day in a life" of your dad? I believe it would be powerful with your skills.

michswiss

I agree with swift. I think there's the potential to create something profound in doing a short environmental or documentary set with your father.

Kikoprice

I find it interesting how he has his workbench organized. Hand drill with the drill bits on the right. Wood plane, and chisels on the left, ruler and pencils in the middle. Your photograph makes me feel like he is trying to organize his thoughts as best he could. Great pic, sparked emotion in me. Ive been a contractor for many years, so I can relate. Sorry to hear about your Dad, I would love to see a day in the life..if you decide to do it.

Frank

lizzard_nyc

When I first saw this post I pretty much froze on your last shot. After the quaint village shots etc. I was not expecting the revelation of the last shot with the explanation. I looked at the tidbits for a long time and kept going back to the tennis balls and how out of place they seem, yet just as organized as the rest.
I am still pretty young, yet my mind is scrambled half the time with all my "to do" lists and obligations. I can very easily see this being the future. It's a disconcerting shot to say the least and can't imagine it happening to someone I love.

As to the suggestions, I'm not sure I agree. Some things maybe should be private, depending on his personality. I know my mother wouldn't want it.

swifteye

lizzard_nyc wrote: »

As to the suggestions, I'm not sure I agree. Some things maybe should be private, depending on his personality. I know my mother wouldn't want it.

I have had three older friends go the way of Dementia, Alzheimer, and Lou Gerigs. I regret not photographing them. I believe it would be a valuable contribution to understanding our humanity and facing death and dieing. Our society tends to embrace the futility of immortality. I believe, Sync, that given the location and context of your father's life that it could be created as a beautiful poem that would honor him. I think of the images done by Eugene Smith. It would take courage, compassion, and a place of deep love to make it happen. It would take commitment. In the case of my three friends, I lacked those ingredients at that time.

Sync, you last image is powerful in its own right- the other images and the words support the impact of the singular image. The question is: is that enough? What are the possibilities? Would your friends and family support such a project?

michswiss

Just to second Jamie's comment again. I don't assume you'd need to share the images with anyone at this point, but I'm confident that having the images ten or fifteen years down the road would be immeasurably valuable.

swifteye

michswiss wrote: »

Just to second Jamie's comment again. I don't assume you'd need to share the images with anyone at this point, but I'm confident that having the images ten or fifteen years down the road would be immeasurably valuable.

Right on!

Syncopation

Thanks for the comments everyone - they're greatly appreciated.

Physically he is still in good shape and there is nothing apparently unusual about his behaviour other than being overly dependent on routines. The main problem is that he struggles to process words without visual clues and prompts. This makes it difficult for him to respond to questions and to have a conversation which is the most upsetting aspect of his condition

Fortunately my mother is fit and healthy and able to provide the day-to-day care that allows him to function as normally as possible.

The lack of any physical signs makes it difficult to show how the disease is affecting him. The workbench really struck me as a reflection of his need to have structure and organisation in his life and as such says what I want it to at this stage.

As to a more extended portrait, that's something I need to give a lot more thought to, but thank you for the suggestion.