Chance

NirNir Registered Users Posts: 1,400 Major grins
edited March 11, 2005 in The Big Picture
Chance



Yesterday it was over. The syringe piston was inserted and within ten seconds you no longer knew I was still there, beside you, loving, embracing, shedding tears. Within a minute your heart stopped beating. The end of a wonderful eleven-year friendship, a period of service in which you gave everything; to me, to my family, to my children. One more caress you could no longer feel and I left quickly – to deal with my conscience, to cry by myself, to hug my family.
From your first nights in our home, when I took you to sleep with me, to comfort you in your longing for the warmth and closeness of your mother and siblings, to your last difficult and painful weeks, lacking the mischievous and dignity that characterized your life, you brought us so much joy. You were always happy when we came, wagging not only your docked tail but your whole banana shaped body and you so enjoyed our caresses and hugs. You would run to bring a ball, daring us to try and grab it, not giving in … triumphant in your small victory. From a small puppy exerting yourself to raise your front feet on the kitchen stool, to a big ten year old puppy, gracefully leaping over sofa with joy and excitement to be the first at the door on our arrival, you were a playful dog with a loving heart. I raised you and you raised my children, your adopted brothers who you accepted with so much love. You absorbed yourself in their attention and enjoyed their play and hugs.
The end is so sad. It was so sad to see your health deteriorating and your pain. The last day was very painful for me – taking you out for the last time, feeding you for the last time … how difficult it was for me to take the role of God and decide your destiny. I am not worthy. Although I understand it is my duty, that there is nothing more humane that I can do for you, my heart aches.
Even in your last moments you gave me your unlimited faith. “Sit”, and you sat, submissively, as though you understood, as though you knew. You were indifferent to my presence. Was this approval on your part? Was it your will?
I was asked and gave permission. I ordered the syringe piston inserted and within ten seconds you no longer knew I was still there, beside you, loving, embracing, shedding tears.
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__________________

Nir Alon

images of my thoughts

Comments

  • AndyAndy Registered Users Posts: 50,016 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    my sympathies, nir.

    putting a pet down is never easy. my thoughts are with you as you mourn the loss.

    andy
  • Michiel de BriederMichiel de Brieder Registered Users Posts: 864 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    my condolences Nir, it is always hard to lose a dear friend....
    *In my mind it IS real*
    Michiel de Brieder
    http://www.digital-eye.nl
  • BridgeCityBridgeCity Registered Users Posts: 338 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    Sorry to hear Nir, I hope people's prayers find you well
  • AngeloAngelo Super Moderators Posts: 8,937 moderator
    edited March 10, 2005
    Chance:

    It's taken me a few minutes to compose myself and respond to you. Such a loving tribute. I feel for your loss. I recently had the same experience with my Cocker Spaniel, Abbie, who lived a wonderful 19 yrs.
  • wxwaxwxwax Registered Users Posts: 15,471 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    So sad. Beautifully written, Nir, you brought a tear to my eye.
    Sid.
    Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam
    http://www.mcneel.com/users/jb/foghorn/ill_shut_up.au
  • ehughesehughes Registered Users Posts: 1,675 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    A very nice tribute Nir.. I'm sure most of us have had that experience with a pet at one time or another, but it's never easy.. Take Care


    Ed
  • 4labs4labs Registered Users Posts: 2,089 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    I am terribly sorry for your loss. That was a wonderful tribute. Thanks for sharing it with us.
  • marlofmarlof Registered Users Posts: 1,833 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    I'm sorry about your loss, Nir. For what it's worth: it sure looks like your dog put his faith in the right human.
    enjoy being here while getting there
  • MitchellMitchell Registered Users Posts: 3,503 Major grins
    edited March 10, 2005
    Sorry for your loss. You did him justice with your beautiful and moving tribute.


    mitch
  • Steve CaviglianoSteve Cavigliano Super Moderators Posts: 3,599 moderator
    edited March 10, 2005
    My sincerest condolences Nir.

    What a beautiful and well written eulogy. Please, don't blame yourself for ordering the injection. I'm sure Chance knew how much he meant to you and knew that you were always looking out for his best interests, even to the end.
    That you made the ultimate decision, as painful as it was for you, to try to ease his pain and suffering shows how deeply you cared.

    Chance is physically gone, but his spirit lives on in your heart and mind.


    So sorry Nir,
    Steve
    SmugMug Support Hero
  • luckyrweluckyrwe Registered Users Posts: 952 Major grins
    edited March 11, 2005
    "If there are no dogs in Heaven,
    then when I die I want to go
    where they went."
    Will Rogers, 1897-1935
  • Ann McRaeAnn McRae Registered Users Posts: 4,584 Major grins
    edited March 11, 2005
    My condolences, Nir. What a loving remembrance!

    Take care

    ann
  • David_S85David_S85 Administrators Posts: 13,249 moderator
    edited March 11, 2005
    Its never an easy thing to do. And shouldn't be.
    My sincere sympathy...

    When I went through this late last year, I was in tears and trembling and hardly able to speak when I signed the written order at the vet hospital for our 13-yr. old cat. They are truly full members of the family from day one until the end of their lives, aren't they?

    May you find peace in your decision, and remember all the good days you had together.

    :cry
    My Smugmug
    "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take" - Wayne Gretzky
  • lr1811lr1811 Registered Users Posts: 363 Major grins
    edited March 11, 2005
    a sad day
    I am sorry for your loss Nir. When I think about the pain I went through with 2 of my dogs, I wonder if it's worth ever having another. Then I look at your shots and a lot of great memories make me smile again.

    Brian
  • luckyrweluckyrwe Registered Users Posts: 952 Major grins
    edited March 11, 2005
    I have three dogs. It is always worth having another. I am glad that I can give the dogs a wonderful life. So many of them at the shelter would love just one day of love.
  • lynnesitelynnesite Registered Users Posts: 747 Major grins
    edited March 11, 2005
    The hardest part of our lives with pets is that we have to say goodbye so often...it's hard to make that choice when they try so hard to stick it out. I hope your happy memories give you some peace. Love the butt shot!

    Lynne
  • ian408ian408 Administrators Posts: 21,948 moderator
    edited March 11, 2005
    Nir,

    Thanks for sharing something near and dear to your heart, Chance. The
    pictures gave us a sense of who he was. Hard to pick a favorite from that
    bunch but the family with dog looking over the wall is a good example of
    how we include our pets in our lives.

    Beautiful eulogy.

    Ian
    Moderator Journeys/Sports/Big Picture :: Need some help with dgrin?
  • KhaosKhaos Registered Users Posts: 2,435 Major grins
    edited March 11, 2005
    My sympathy on your loss.

    You've done a beautiful tribute to your lost family member.
  • NirNir Registered Users Posts: 1,400 Major grins
    edited March 11, 2005
    My sincere thanks to all you guys for your very kind words!

    Chance was indeed a member of the family. The kids treated him as their brother and always spoke of him so. Over the past 2 months or so the signs were pretty clear but it was easier not to believe. This was our first parting with a pet of so many years who was really so much a part of the family. I still expect him to pop into the kitchen as we sit to dine...

    You guys are great and make it just a little easier!

    Thank you!
    __________________

    Nir Alon

    images of my thoughts
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