attempt at a portrait C&C

NateWagner

I tried taking this shot recently, and have edited it a bit in lightroom.


I think it may have a bit of a red tint now that I look at it. However, I'm on my crappy work monitor and I can't really tell. Her left arm is also slightly in the photo which bothers me... I need to get rid of that (maybe when I get home)

Anyway, if you're willing to take the time, I would love to hear C&C

Greensquared

All in all I think this is very nice. The left arm can easily be cloned out. A vignette might be nice too to help draw you into her eyes. But really, I like it a lot.

jeffreaux2

For a second try....

The colors you see may be a simple case of pushing too much with "vibrance" or saturation. She is a beautiful young lady, and I think you have done well.

Just noticed some blown areas in her hair and face. Too much contrast?

BriShay

nice shot, however, there is something about her right arm that really distracts me from her face....

joshhuntnm

Nice shot. you have identified a couple of things that can make it better, and i agree on both. You did a good job.

NateWagner

Greensquared: Thanks for the suggestion, I think a vignette may also help focus the attention on her face instead of the arms.

Jeffreaux2: I'll make sure to watch those highlights, so many different things to remember, I've been looking at quite a few similar photos recently and after a while I adjust to looking at the tint and don't realize it's off (now that I'm looking at it, it's definitely bothering me.

Brishay: thanks for the comment. What would you suggest that I do to fix that right arm, or to work with it? Would a vignette help? or are you thinking more of a crop, or there's nothing I really can do about it.

Joshhuntnm: Thanks for the encouragement, I appreciate it.

Swartzy

This particular photo begs for a different pose. It feels unnatural and contrived as the angle is a bit "forced". Unfortunately, it is a bit difficult to find the proper vernacular on the forum but a slight head tilt, a better camera angle would serve it well. Nice look from her but because of the tight crop in conjunction with the angle makes the viewer a bit uneasy. Such a pretty girl you want the photo to "flow". Hope this make sense.

NateWagner

Swartzy: First of all, thank you for taking the time to respond. As I read your response I have a few questions... so if you or anybody has the time to make these clear to me I would really appreciate it.

the angle is a bit "forced". Unfortunately, it is a bit difficult to find the proper vernacular on the forum but a slight head tilt,

I'm afriad I'm not sure exactly what you mean by the angle is forced, I thought it was pretty natural at the time. Is it the lack of of a head tilt? Does forced mean that the pose is something she would not naturally do? I'm confused.

a better camera angle would serve it well.

I was probably a little bit close on this one, even if I crop it out it's still rather tight. Even so, what else would have been a better angle? higher looking down? more to the right so she would have turned more? more left to straighten the look out?

you want the photo to "flow".

I'm afraid I'm not sure what you mean by flow exactly.

Nate

Swartzy

Hi Nate...I'll start by the last and work towards the first....heheh...what would one expect from me?

Ok, the flow part....which is really the answer to the other components above:

A photo has lines, curves, movement if you will. A viewer (and that's the toughest part looking at a shot taken by us) wants the picture to look smooth, appealing, interesting, something that will want them to view it over and over. If elements of the photo have distracting features then it makes them distant...not wanting to view it again and again....

The angle of the model/subject, the facial features, the lines of the hair, head, nose, mouth, eyes all play a part in the overall "appeal" to the viewer.

Now, remember, since you took the shot, you are way too "close" to what you see......you have to step back and think like a non photographer....what do you see now? Is it appealing? What could be better? Would a less crop and more arms and shoulders be more inviting? Would a different head tilt, different smile, different angle of facial features draw the viewer in? It's really tough for us all who take the shots to consider these things...as we become so "attached" to the images and lose sight of what it really is. That's why I will often "table" an image and come back to it the next day until I see the instinctive "draw" that it has, or does not have.

This art is tough enough let alone our attachments to each image. Guess the best way I can convey the concept is: does this really knock your socks off or would a different angle, pose, look, or other features do the trick?

Just some ideas to consider....I too learn every day. None of us will ever "arrive" cause it's about the journey.

codiac2600

I like the shot for some reasons, I'm iffy about the shot for other reasons.

Likes: The composition is good, the lighting is good, the expression is good.

Dis-likes: The blown highlight in the hair, but that seemed unavoidable. The face seems pulled forward which makes her look a little funny. I tend to ask models to pull there shoulders back when taking a shot this close in and at a downward angle as it's more flattering.

A great start and I do like what you've done in lightroom.

NateWagner

Swartzy: I do think that less of a crop with more arms and shoulders might be good, but in the original I didn't take it far enough away to make it better. It chops off at the forearms, and I think almost makes her arms look like a monkey. I think in the future I need to be more careful with hand placement, and my own angle.

The blown highlight in the hair, but that seemed unavoidable. The face seems pulled forward which makes her look a little funny. I tend to ask models to pull there shoulders back when taking a shot this close in and at a downward angle as it's more flattering.

Codiac: I've tried to mess with the hair a bit to get the highlights back, and I'll try to upload it a bit later (I also got rid of some of that red). I can see what you mean about the face being pulled forward... that does look a bit odd, thanks for pointing that out.

I suppose that an added benefit of taking the photo from higher up would help make the neck seem less pulled forward as well.

Thanks all for your comments so far

codiac2600

NateWagner wrote:

Swartzy: I do think that less of a crop with more arms and shoulders might be good, but in the original I didn't take it far enough away to make it better. It chops off at the forearms, and I think almost makes her arms look like a monkey. I think in the future I need to be more careful with hand placement, and my own angle.



Codiac: I've tried to mess with the hair a bit to get the highlights back, and I'll try to upload it a bit later (I also got rid of some of that red). I can see what you mean about the face being pulled forward... that does look a bit odd, thanks for pointing that out.

I suppose that an added benefit of taking the photo from higher up would help make the neck seem less pulled forward as well.

Thanks all for your comments so far

No worries

I shoot tons of model books and portfolios and a lot of my stuff is on the edgy and crazy angles side so I notice this stuff more so than a typical portrait photographer. I love shooting from up high and down low, it's a new perspective that hasn't been exploited as much as it should be.

Seneca

Since you asked for CC's...here is my one - Her head looks bigger than her body in that position.

I do like the expression you captured.

NateWagner

Codiac: I looked at some of your photos and I like the a lot... excellent work

Seneca: I see what you mean about the head looking bigger than the body, I think it's cause the face was closer, and the shoulders were sort of bunched together. I think if I take codiac's advice and have her keep her shoulders back, it should help fix that problem. Thanks for commenting

I tried a different crop here, let me know if it's any better.